Timng is a real thing.
But, don’t you hate it when someone says, “I guess it just wasn’t the right time?”
I mean, let’s be honest. When something doesn’t work out and someone says that, it feels like you’d like to punch them in the face and yell, “Well, when is it MY TIME??” #mytime
Am I right?
But, let me ask you this:
Has there ever been something you really wanted, and it didn’t come to you right when you wanted it. But, THEN when you did actually get it, you realized “Wow, it’s a good thing I didn’t get that back then, because I wouldn’t have truly been able to handle it.”
This has happened to me so many times, not just in my career, but in life too!
You know me, I’m very driven, I go after the things I want and when I don’t get them I’m a little annoyed #reallyannoyed
But, then years later (and yes, sometimes it is MANY years later) it becomes so clear that it didn’t happen back then because it wasn’t the right time for whatever reason.
Timing is real.
It may not always work out in the exact moment that we want it, but if we keep working toward something, it will eventually be the right time. One of my favorite quotes from the late, great Eartha Kitt, who was a personal friend, was “God might not always be there when you want him, but he’s always on time.”
And it’s true.
Here are six great ways to deal with the moments when you think it is your time, and it turns out that it isn’t.
1. Don’t give it deeper meaning. Just because the role didn’t go to you THIS time, or the big break didn’t happen THIS time, doesn’t mean you are not talented, or people don’t like you, or whatever other “meaning” you like to put on it. Actually just choosing to say, “This wasn’t the right time” can actually free you from expectation and frustration.
2. Keep doing the work. Timing is a combination of preparedness and opportunity. So, don’t stop working at your highest level just because this one didn’t happen. Keep up all the great action that got you this far in the process and eventually it will be your turn.
3. No, doesn’t mean never. Timing is a funny thing. But, let’s be honest, so is casting. Casting is about as random a process as it could possibly be. Just because it didn’t happen this time doesn’t mean it won’t happen EVER. It just means not this time. Period.
4. Have a timing declaration. Create a really wonderful quote or declaration you can say to yourself when the timing was off this time. Use Eartha’s quote above or my personal favorite, “I am a star, I’m just enjoying my last moments of anonymity.” Have fun with your quote so it instantly puts you in a good mental place to move on. #declaration
5. Acknowledge the truth. Look clearly at yourself and don’t try to figure out why it didn’t happen this time. If you know you were AWESOME in that audition, keep that alive in your heart because it is probably true. And also be truthful with yourself on what you can strengthen for next time. #truth
6. Create the right timing. Be consistent in your acting “practices.” Work on your audition material consistently, stay in touch with the industry, be kind to others, celebrate their successes, and in general, stay committed to your goals, and timing will eventually work in your favor.
Take a minute now to remember a time when you wanted something, didn’t get it, then years later DID get it and you realized NOW was the right time, and share your story in the comments below.
Leslie Becker is an award-winning Broadway actress, writer, and creator of The Organized Actor® and is passionate about inspiring, entertaining and educating others. Known as the #1 Empowerment Coach for Actors, her teachings have touched more than 300,000 actors in the past 24 years. To learn more, visit www.OrganizedActor.com. And don’t forget to join her FREE Facebook Group to be with serious and like-minded actors Organized Actor Alliance.